Good morning everyone, well it is here as of the writing of this. It's a rainy Saturday, here in lovely urban New Jersey and I love these days. Perfect time to stop in and see how everyone is doing. While I was thinking about what to write it kinda hit me. I wanted to say, I am sorry.
I am so sorry you are suffering right now, whether is is anxiety, health issues, addiction or something I can't even think of. I have a friend and every time she tells me she is in a bad mood I say, "I'm sorry," and she answers "Why, it's not your fault?" But it is empathy not guilt that makes me say that.
I know that many of you have been struggling, and what almost makes it worse is, you are struggling more than most people even know. Either because they haven't gone through it and don't understand or because you have lost so many people due to the situation that you are afraid to show others and risk losing them too. I know, I've been there. So afraid to be who you are because you have lost so much. And that isolates us even in a crowd of people who care for us and makes everything so much harder.
Well here is the good news, if there is any in this; you are NOT alone. There are millions of people suffering just like you, we just don't talk about it. Right now in households around the world, people are depressed, failing in marriages, scared and so damn tired. That is why I wanted to make this page, so you could have a place to come and not be alone and read comments from others and myself, to let you know you are going to be okay and there are others who care very much about you even if we've never met.
Listen, I've been where you are more or less. There have been nights I asked God to take me or give me comfort because I just couldn't go on one more second. I've watched good friends look at me strange and smile that weird smile when all they are thinking is "Get over it already."
Today the best thing to know is you are not alone even though it feels like it. And besides for saying I am sorry you are going through this, you don't deserve this and I wouldn't even wish this on my worst enemy, I want you to know, that I know how strong you are. You really are, you've made it this far, even though your head and heart say you wouldn't. You carried on most of the time alone, stuck in your own head, and for that I think you really are beautiful. Scars don't make people ugly; unkindness, despair and anger do. All your scars do, physical and emotional both, is prove how strong you really are and that as much as you may have wanted to give up, you haven't. And that makes you truly beautiful in my eyes, not matter what you feel.
So for all those times you felt alone, cried in the dark or prayed for the energy just to go on living, I am sorry, you don't deserve that and all though you have handled it like a trooper, I know how very much it hurts. When all you wanted was a hand to hold and a voice to tell you it's going to be alright, you got silence and strange looks. Well that's over now, this is a safe place. Everyone here has cried, is hurting and felt hopeless and powerless at time.
So lets focus on today on just admitting we are where we are, and that with help we can all get better, that we will stop listening to the lies that tell us how weak we are, when in reality you are amazing and strong! The next post we can go over some things I have found that helps me, but today just know you are loved and special and welcome here. And in case you have not heard it in a long time, or ever, I think you are beautiful and I know you are strong. Be welcome and comment so we can all comfort each other and take comfort too. You are too precious for the world to lose, it really does need you, and when you are strong again you will be able to share that strength with others and be part of a wonderful support to people who feel hopeless.
God bless you my friends and may His love shine down on you and keep you safe. Thanks for sharing this long hard journey with me. The company is appreciated.
Frank
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